Transformational work invites us sit with what might not be working in our lives and look at how to shift, change, reframe, or learn from it to make it more positive – including how we see our relationships and connections.
As the people in my world grow older, I have become more aware of the finiteness of their presence in my life, as well as the positive experiences I’ve had with them.
How would our perspective of life change if we mixed the parts that “don’t work” with our positive experiences and connections?
Who were the people who cheered you on, taught you new things, and engaged you in experiences that you will remember for a lifetime? People like:
- Family
- Friends
- Teachers
- Coaches
- Bosses
As I sat with this list, I realized that the lessons of life are like a patchwork or mosaic made up of a compilation of learnings – some formal and some informal, both big and small, from many different sources.
My insights range from the seemingly minor – my mother-in-law showed me that the lids on plastic containers had numbers that corresponded with the bowls to which they match up – to the people who influenced what schools, cities, and jobs I targeted; each a stepping stone on my life’s path. Some lessons were about how to do things or how to “be”, and others taught me who I did not want to be.
In addition to the lessons, there were the people who represented the positive voices, (what I could do), and were crucial at times when there were many voices telling me what I could not do or be. Some came into my awareness as distant memories, and others (teachers, family friends, and host families from my studies overseas) I personally took time to re-find them in order to thank them for the positive ways they had impacted my life.
There is a saying that people are in our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. How great it felt to reconnect with some of those who were in for a reason or a season!
It can be so easy to get caught up in the darkness of judgments or negative memories and forget there is so much goodness and light.
Who are the people in your life that deserve an acknowledgement or a thank you? How often do you thank yourself for the positive impact you have had on other people’s lives, or what you have achieved? Do you judge others for what they didn’t do or see the goodness in what they did do? Are you envious of what others can do and find yourself lacking, or do you openly appreciate all your accomplishments and “ways of being” that make you great?
If acknowledging yourself and others is absent from your life, or you are unable to see the positive qualities and influences that are present within and around you, consider some transformational coaching.